Alan Maguires 5 Favourite Things
Dreams
Dreams are something I will always go back to, sometimes I wish they’d never end but I suppose I’m grounded in this reality for a reason. The way I see it, dreaming is almost like dying, like recently I was a kid again and my dream parents put me up for adoption, the dream wasn’t lifelong or anything I just kinda knew. Anyway I was in foster care or something, then I ate some bad tuna, then I was at some health food store and I look up and there they are, the fuckers even realised who I was straight away, they knew that I was their kid, then I collapsed because of the bad tuna. They didn’t tell me, but they didn’t love me, I knew, I just had this feeling, they did help me up and I wanted to live with them, then wouldn’t ya know it I woke up. Dreaming is so surreal, sometimes I’m convinced that both worlds have merged, it happens most days and I’m like WTF!, that feeling makes me question this reality, so which is the real one, or are dreams just a bunch of memories playing out in some fantastic film. Maybe my dream parents didn’t love me, that could be true, maybe I should make an appointment to see Sigmund Freud.
Dracula
I know some facts about the Count and his Romanian counterpart Vlad the Impaler and I have read the novel and it’s sublime sequel. Some fans and critics weren’t happy with the official sequel but Dacre Stoker and Ian Holt did a superb job, I devoured every word. They think the book sucks try watching Gary Oldmans screen version of the count, bloody awful. This is beginning to sound like a review. I only recently watched the Lugosi version and I loved it, Lugosi was born to play Dracula, it’s a shame that he played Dracula in Ed Woods plan 9 from Outer Space, it’s sad really that he couldn’t find much work. Don’t get me started on the Castlevania series, every bloody time Dracula is back, come on think of another villain, Satan, Death perhaps Alucard maybe. Dracula has really been whored over the past century and that’s why the official sequel was published. Bloody, bloody, bloody, I think that’s enough bloody’s, oh no wait, bloody Mary had an awful bloody time at the bloody morgue, her bloody husband Arthur fell down the bloody stairs, breaking his bloody neck. Why was she called bloody Mary? I don’t bloody know, maybe because she was soaked in blood?
Nintendo
I don’t know what it is about the Japanese company, but they were meant to exist. I’ve been a fan for years now and I always will be. Knowing that they exist makes me happy. When they first established in 1889 they knocked out hanafuda cards, they even had a taxi service, then electronic toys. These days Nintendo is a dream making factory. Nintendo makes me smile every time, with games like animal crossing and Zelda the world is a better place. I know people say videogames are bad and they make kids violent, well Nintendo doesn’t add blood and gore to their recipe, so back off ignorant American mom okay. Remember the Pokémon craze and kids were having fits due to the bright lights in the t.v show, kids went crazy for the rarest cards. Nintendo have still got it and ya know what? they don’t have any real strategy, they don’t really worry or care, like I said, Nintendo is supposed to exist. Their motto is, “we do what we can, the best that we can and await the results”.
Charles Bukowski
I’ve read a few of Bukowski’s books and I’m hooked. I just like the way that he writes, easy to understand and honest. I have a compilation of his poetry which is called ‘Pleasures of the Damned’, I’ve even been influenced by his work but when I do write poetry I try not to imitate him. Take for instance a poem that I wrote titled ‘Elephantus Insanus’, to me and Bukowski fans it would sound like a Bukowski poem, but that’s a good thing. I believe every writer needs someone to look up to, someone that they can identify with. My writing style is actually Americanized, again the American influences or maybe I was American in a past life. Maybe I was a writer who didn’t get his big break, maybe my life was taken too early, maybe I owed money to some loan sharks, hey a writer writes all day, and hardly gets any sunlight, his girlfriend nags and nags, “get a job” she says, “get a job” she says, “but I have a damn job” I tell her, “I have a damn job”. “But it don’t pay the bills” she says, “it don’t pay the bills”. Then the sharks come round again, they already broke my hands, my precious hands, then they remove me from this world. But that’s what they believe, that’s what they believe.
Conspiracies
I went to a conference recently, there were some big names there. The first guy was talking about 9/11, but I’ve seen plenty of videos on you tube already so I was aware of that since 2008. Yep, I’m one of those nut jobs who believes that it was orchestrated to terrorize the populace. To make them frightened, to have more control over them, to take their freedom and to wipe them off the face of the planet. Each speaker talked about how the different ways that the Elite were doing this. More and more Irish people are realizing that they’ve been used by Mr. Cowen and his cohorts, to him we are nothing but slaves. But we have a voice, a choice, the thing is we’ve been blinded by corruption and lies, some speakers went way overboard, but the speakers who had actual facts were more interesting. So I’m not actually crazy okay, I have no mental health problems, I was told this by a professional psychiatrist, who I had to visit recently. The politicians did what most politicians in this country did, tell us what we wanted to hear, give us hope, then screw us over and over and over again.
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